absurdly peculiar

 It's June! This means the wedding is almost here and I have completed most of what I need for decorations. Something I really enjoyed decorating/DIYing was the decorative letters for the welcome table. The base letters were made out of all the extra cardboard we had when we bought new furniture. After cutting out all the letters I needed, I used a glue gun to create "sides" to the letters.  I felt it look unfinished in just cardboard. So for some reason I thought paper mache-ing would help. I used 1 part flour to 1 part water to create the glue and for the paper I used old newspapers. Then after I finished the paper  mache-ing and letting it dry, I spray painted it rose gold. To be honest, I didn't like how it looked... it still had this bumpy texture and I felt it would make the wedding look cheap. I thought I would end up having to buy the letters instead...but a month later I was inspired by something I saw online. I decided to

I've been creating a lot since I've moved into my new place. So many empty walls and spaces makes me want to fill them. I created this painting on a canvas and using a mix of acrylic and spray paint. The base is grey and gold acrylic paint and it was spray painted over with rose gold spray paint; it felt like it was missing something.. and I got very frustrated. I didn't know what to do.. so I grabbed a bottle of black paint and squeezed it out in no systemic way whatsoever.  I wonder if abstract/modern artists, like Pollock, felt the way I felt when painting this- was he frustrated during most of his paintings? or was his paintings systematic? Anyways, every time I look at this painting it makes me laugh because I just replay how I felt at the moment of creating it... and it was not systematic in any way shape or form- but somehow, it didn't turn out too bad.